At My House: Things I'm Loving and Doing

Sometimes I have so many ideas for blog posts running through my head that I end up writing nothing at all.
Today I'm going to just let the pictures do most of the talking and show you what I've been up to round my place lately.

See that picture above? It's my mantelpiece, which is sporting a new pair of dipped cast-iron candlesticks found at SaveMart for $5.99 the pair. Brightening up the room with a bit of seasonal cut beauty, are some crabapple branches. I think they look amazing. Who needs flowers when you have branches?

Cooking Together is Very Entertaining

It's an idea we'd thought of before, cooking together. One Christmas I even bought the husband "Jamie's 30-Minute Meals". It was always something we thought we might enjoy, but not something we ever got round to.
Until my ever-practical counselor suggested it as a way for us to connect more.
See, in the ever-crazy busy-ness of life we were too often passing each other like ships in the night, our opposite personalities, different ways of relaxing and seldom-intersecting schedules meaning that too often we would only talk deeply when the crap hit the fan. Anyone else know what I'm talking about?
What the engine of our marriage needed was some regular interaction, a shared activity that would bring us together to just hang out on regular basis. Something do-able. Something that wouldn't end up in the too-hard basket. And something we would both enjoy.

Like cooking together.

[Tapas is all about little bites - this is lamb balls, marinated anchovies with tomatoes and olives with dips]

When I ran the idea past the husband he was all for it. Like I said, it's something we've wanted to try for ages but never got around to it.
The husband is pretty useful in the kitchen, with a number of go-to recipes he can whip up when needed, but he was keen to expand his repertoire.
Meanwhile, I was bored to tears with churning out the same tried-and-true dinners on rotation. Sure they were easy, but it would be cool to try new stuff and expand the pool of quick and easy meal options I could call on.

[What Jamie calls a Potato "tortilla" - it's really like a frittata - pan-fried potato cubes with fennel seeds, rosemary, garlic and egg]

And in the past whenever hubby and I managed to work together on a project, we've found it very rewarding, so this was a win-win proposition, in theory. Now it just had to be DONE.

The first week I scoured Jamie's 30-Minute Meals book looking for something that would be fun to cook, not tooooo challenging and something the kids would eat (two out of three of our bunch are super-fussy, and very nervous about trying anything new).

[Sticky Glazed chorizo with the cured meats and cheese platter]

The best option looked like Jamie's Tapas Feast, mixed and matched with a few substitutes from other meals that looked simple enough. Yummy - and hopefully fun to create.

• Cured meats & cheese platter drizzled with honey and ground coffee (!!!)
• DIY anchovy skewers with cherry tomatoes, lemon and thyme
• Sticky chorizo sausage and ciabatta bread
• a Potato "tortilla" with fennel seeds and rosemary
• roasted peppers with Brie
• Minted Lamb balls
• Dips and Spanish olives
• rocket with herbs
• Sliced oranges in chilled sparkling water and Sangria to drink

I figured we should be brave and invite some guests to join us. Saturday night was the appointed time. The ingredients were bought, the brave guests confirmed.

Meanwhile, I was having trouble pinning down my cooking partner as he rushed from one appointment to another, a fifty K cycle to the gym. The husband never sits still (unlike his couch-potato wife, moi).

The conversation would go like this:

Me (waving Jamie's book): "Babe have you got a sec to go through these recipes with me so we know what we need to do on Saturday?"

Him (rushing out the door wearing lycra): "yeah, yeah, I'll get to it, I trust you, just whatever...."

[I wound jute twine around the necks of jars to give a rustic feel]

Saturday dawned, another crazy day of sport and taxiing kids. Come 4pm, we still had not sat down to discuss our menu plans. I began setting the table, rigging up candles in jars, setting the atmosphere.

Where was my cooking buddy? He ended up racing out to get some drinks and the olives I'd forgotten, so I ended up glazing chorizo and roasting fennel seeds alone.

He came back just in to light the candles and save my hanging jar display from falling on our guests' heads. I cooked alone.

The meal was superb, the guests AND kids enjoyed it immensely but I cooked it alone.

[Our friends Gail & Mark came with their kids - who loudly enjoyed the the Tapas feast]

But don't worry I wasn't going to let my cooking partner off that easily. We teased him and got smart about me doing it all alone, and he tried to plead his case ("But you did it so well! This is amazing! you're so good at it!"). Not the point buddy! We're doing this TOGETHER. And there's always next week...

I was not put off. We were going to DO this. TOGETHER. And to make sure I got complete buy-in I asked him to tell me what HE wanted to have a go cooking next time.

Toad-in-the-Hole, he said. That classic English pub dinner of sausages baked in batter.

Righto, you're on, pal.

I searched online and found Jamie's Toad-in-the-Hole recipe. We booked in another round of brave guests to experiment on (it's always more fun with others to share the culinary adventure) and through the week I kept reminding my cooking pal that THIS TIME WE'RE DOING IT TOGETHER.

This time, he did not shirk...

He sprinkled cinnamon, pinched pastry and whisked eggs. He zested oranges and wrangled sausages into hot oil. (He DID question Jamie's wisdom about having a whole CENTIMETRE of vegetable to cook the batter in, but I assured him Jamie knew best).

[Traditional English Toad in the Hole]

Our Toad-in-the-Hole turned out perfectly. Two roasting trays filled with the best Westmere Butchery beef-and-Guinness sausages and melt-in-your mouth Yorkshire pudding batter, delicately flavoured with rosemary. Mmmmmhmmmmm.

[Our brave friends Carla and Bonnar seemed to enjoy their classic English pub fare, as created by us]

We served this English classic to our guests and our kids, with onion gravy, mashed potatoes and peas (your choice of mushy or non-mushy). Classic English pub fare, proudly created by me and my hubby working TOGETHER to feed two hungry families on a wet and wild Saturday night.

For dessert we made Jamie's "Quick Portuguese Tarts" (cinnamon infused pastry shells, filled with zesty custard and topped with homemade caramel). So delish!

It was better than any restaurant. The kids came, ate and then went off to play, while we got to hang out with our (very appreciative) friends, feeling proud that we did it. Together. There was no teasing the husband for leaving it all up to me this time!

I really think we are going to keep doing this on a Saturday night. It means one less night eating takeaways. It means we plan ahead and invite friends to join us, which results in us being more social; our kids get to hang with their friends and so do we. And best of all - we are having fun and connecting while working on creating something together.

Next week we're cooking Italian, and attempting a Tiramisu, among other things. Another family of brave food-testers will be joining us. Can't wait.

LINKS:

• My Recipe Page
• Jamie's Tapas Feast
• Jamie's Toad-in-the-Hole recipe (we doubled the amounts to feed two families)
• Jamie's "Quick Portuguese Tarts"

Kindness is Soul Veggies

It was a typical mad morning, we were rushing round doing the usual getting ready prep, while hubby took a moment to read some verses from Proverbs aloud (as he often does).

The verse which caught my attention was one I've never noticed before:

"Your own soul is nourished when you are kind;
it is destroyed when you are cruel..." 

(Proverbs 11:17-18 Living Translation)

When we are kind we think we are doing someone else a favour - but at the same time we are feeding our own soul.
Conversely when we have been are selfish/thoughtless/unkind to someone we may think we have done it to them,  but at the same time we have hurt our deepest selves. Our own soul is damaged by our meanness.

I grabbed a piece of chalk and wrote that one up on the kitchen blackboard for all of us to see and ponder.

The kids weren't too sure...
"What does nourished mean, mum?"
"You know, like "fed". Your soul gets fed when you do kind things for other people..."
"I don't get it."
"Well, I mean, when you are kind it doesn't just do someone else good, it does YOU good too..."
"Yeah, nah, don't get it..."

"Mum, what is that, 'your soul is nooshed when you're a kid'? What is nooshed?"
"Nourished, not nooshed. It means "fed". Like made stronger when you're KIND (not a kid). You soul gets stronger and healthier. Like when you eat veggies, they are good for your body...??? Kindness is like veggies for your soul???"
"Ohhhh, um, yeah... nah... huh...?"

?!?!?!

Gee I thought it was obvious, and such a good nuggets of parenting wisdom.
Ahhh well. We'll keep trying to reinforce the importance of kindness.
Cos it's good for everybody's soul.

FREE Social Media Icons for Your Blog (you're welcome)

A few years ago I put together a collection of social media icons in various different styles and turned them into Code for people to grab and use.
Considering how common these little puppies are they can be surprisingly difficult to find in an easy-to-use form.

I remember spending hours - days - weeks - hunting for a simple way to add social media buttons to my blog and although I found plenty of actual icons, nowhere could I find a simple way to install them (I'm not on Wordpress, I don't have access to Plug-ins).

Eventually I stumbled across some code, figured out how to make it work, and created that original post with the grabable code for collections of social media icons. My pain, your gain.

Today I'm adding a bunch of new styles to the collection, to help all you lovely code-phobic bloggers out there beautify your blog without busting a brain cell.

These buttons have been *mostly* created by me in Photoshop (with the exception of the Sleek Collection - the style is originally by DesignBolts but I made two different versions of them and turned them into code for easy installation).

Great Expectations (a Motherhood post)

I almost titled this post, "Why I hate Mothers Day" but decided that might be a bit harsh.
I don't REALLY hate Mother's Day, but sometimes it can be a bit... disappointing.
See, it's all about expectations.

If yesterday had been just a normal day, it would have been better than average. But when you know every person you meet is going to ask, "Did you get spoilt? Did you get breakfast in bed?" (and you got a call from the kitchen: "Your cup of tea is on the bench!") you kind of want to huddle in your bed and not face anyone.

It's not that your family didn't try, either. Like I said, if this was just an ordinary day, it would be better than average.
Not often your daughter makes your bed for you and announces, "There's a surprise in your room, mum!"
Not often your son does the dishes without being asked.
A card, some gifts.
These are lovely things.

So why did I find myself sitting in my bed with tears running down my face? Am I a sook? Am I a spoilt baby? Did I expect violins and breakfast on a tray with a rose in a vase? The gifts to be wrapped instead of still in the store-bags?
Or was it that I was hoping that my kids would take me seriously when I said, "All I want on Mother's Day is for you kids to be nice to each other. No fighting. No talking back. Be helpful. Listen to what daddy and me ask you. That's all..."?

Did I hope that each and every one of them would strive to give me a day without conflict, without growling. A day of Peace and Serenity? (Which, let's be honest, is every Mother's dream).

Yeah, that's it. All of the above, probably.
Which is why as I sat on my bed trying on my new slippers (oops too small) and heard the shouting and whingeing echoing through the hallway, the hissed command of "Shush! Stop being selfish - it's Mother's Day!" didn't really help.

I was seriously bummed. And I wanted to stay in bed, hide from the world. Let them go to church without me and leave me to sip my tea in peace...

But no. Hubby wasn't having a bar of that.
"Come on, get up out of that pit," he ordered, ripping back the covers and snapping me out of my funk. "You want to send your kids to church without you on Mothers day, when everyone else is has their Mother there and it's all for Mothers? Stop sulking and get dressed, we'll start over fresh."

So that's what we did.
I got out of my pit, got dressed and as I did I thought about Expectations. And the fact that it was those sneaky hopes of soft-focused peace-filled perfection that were really setting me up for a fall.

Because the reality is that a day without conflict or whingeing of any kind round these parts is a mighty big ask. In fact, it's nigh on impossible.

But if I went into Mother's Day with NO EXPECTATIONS I would actually have a day that was better than most.
The second half of the day, sans-sulking and self-pity, was a vast improvement.

I faced reality head-on and abandoned all expectations. (Those sneaky voices that creep up and tap me on the shoulder and say, "You deserve better. look what you do for THEM. Look how much effort you go to for THEM. You should be treated as a veritable QUEEN today!" I ignore those buggers, they cause nothing but trouble).

Yes I may have loved to go out to a nice restaurant and survey my offspring gathered about me like trophies, as we dined joyfully on a meal I had no hand in preparing. But let's be honest.
I have two - probably three - kids with ADHD. They don't like to sit still for long. I'm better off at home.

When hubby asked what I wanted to do for lunch, I took reality by the teets and replied, "I'd love you to get some treats from the French deli; we can eat outside and I'll set it up pretty."

I cut some roses from the vine and hung bunting, spread my favourite cloth and put out the nice bowls, while hubby went and got salami, brie, chicken and crusty loaves.
Then me and my hubby chilled together under the dying grapevine while the kids came, ate then went, leaving us in peace. I didn't care if they were on the computer/Wii/PS3 - I had peace and prettiness even if it was a DIY job. It was a good choice, better than a flash restaurant. More doable for us, and probably far more enjoyable.
SCORE: Mother's Day Serenity: 1, Unrealistic expectations: zip.

Later I baked my mum a cake. It's her Mother's Day too after all. It's not just about me,
"I'd like us ALL to go over to Nan and Grandad's with the cake," I told my tribe.
It would likely have been easier to just go myself, but I wanted my family to come so I played the Mothers Day card like the ace I'd kept up my sleeve.
We took the Nespresso machine and hubby made us all coffees, while we ate cake and played that hand-slapping game (my mum was the champion). Later SHE posted on Facebook that she'd had the BEST Mother's Day ever - which is awesome.

I had avoided social media for most of the day, not wanting to see all the golden glowing photos of rose tinted mothers day greetings in case I was tempted to compare my day with other more glamorous Mother's Days - but it seemed that I was not the only one whose expectations had to be reigned in.
Mother's Day seems to have served up mixed results.

However, over all, I felt like my Mother's Day was a WIN.
It might not have begun as the hoped-for day of glory, peace and honour which I felt I deserved, but that's only when I compare my day to idealised soft-focused TV commercials.

Most of us don't have paid actors reading from a script, playing a part in our Mother's Day scenario - we have real live kids.

Kids who want to do the right thing but who are still, essentially selfish. Kids who while well-intentioned, would still rather go on Movie Star Planet than vacuum the house. Kids who are kind enough to bring in the cup of tea going cold on the bench (when they realise you're upset because your Mother's Day is not like the commercial), who make your bed when you're not looking - but who get distracted after that watching Adventure Time and forget to strew roses in your path as you walk.

Kids who may give you the best hugs and kisses EVERY DAY and who tell you CONSTANTLY that they love you and you're the best mum ever, but who On The Day complain about having to get dressed up half decent and whinge about having to help "just because it's mother's day".

My kids are a mixed bag, a work in progress. It will probably take until they have kids of their own until they fully appreciate all that I've done for them. I know that's how it happened for me - I didn't "get it" until I became a mother myself. I didn't appreciate my mum properly until I was one myself.

In the meantime, until they grow up and realise my true awesomeness, I'll take my mixed bag, sort out the lovely moments from the less-than-ideal and throw away disappointment with my expectations.

Then and only then will I be able to enjoy Mother's Day, as simply a better-than-average day.
And if I'm smart I just might remember that the best thing about it is that I GET TO BE A MUM to these crazy-but-wonderful humans. Which is worth celebrating, even if I have to do the decorating myself.

.............................

OTHER HONEST MOTHERHOOD RAMBLINGS:

• Ten Cool Things About Motherhood
• Confessions of a Lazy Mother
• Ten Worst Mothering Moments 
• Getting Over Myself 
• Not My Mother's Daughter
• Sometimes... (a motherhood post)

Bathroom DIY and the Miracle of White Paint

My bathroom had been haunting me with its hideousness for too many years. It was a sea of pine paneling and whoever fitted it out (back in the Eighties?) lacked even the good sense to install a plain white bath. My pine paradise sported a beige bath and shower, peachy beige sink and awesome peach towel rails to match.

As with my previously pine kitchen, any major reno was way down on the "House Fix" list. Priorities were replace the roof, replace the boiler and get the mortgage down.

If I wanted rid of the pine-and-beige ugliness it was up to me and my paintbrush.

I took heart from the success of my kitchen makeover, and knew that I had convinced my hubby that acres of pine was naff and white painted wood was so much cooler.

Plus I still had half a pail of white paint from the kitchen and plenty of the smooth-surface sealer. All I needed was a free day and enough elbow grease to get the job done.

[All that ugly wood paneling darkened the room and was just begging to be painted white] 

When an uncluttered day finally dawned, here's how I did it:

FIRST UP: Paint every bit of wood paneling with a coat of Resene Smooth Surface Sealer. Don't forget the ugly peach towel rail, give that a coat as well.

Goodbye heinous wooden vanity. I wish i could just rip you out and replace you, but in the meantime, you shall be WHITE...

NEXT: By the time I had worked my way round the entire bathroom with the undercoat, the first panel was ready for a coat of white. Oh man this was going to look so PRETTY!

Coat after coat (1 undercoat, two top coats) we majicked away the ugly pine...

In its place is fresh and lovely white tongue-and-groove. The whole room now glows with light.

I painted the non-paneled walls with Resene "nebula" - a blue-grey paint that seems to change shade depending on the light.

White paint really is a miracle worker.
Of course the paint hasn't taken away the ugly peachy vanity top or the beige bath, but it has reduced their impact.
The ugly dated fixtures kind of fade into the background and the crisp white tongue-and-groove paneling makes the room feel bright and fresh.
I can live with the dated fixtures much more happily now that the wood is gone.
One day when the mortgage is paid and we have a budget for a proper reno, we'll get a new flash bathroom suite. ONE DAY.
But even then, I think I'll keep the tongue and groove - I love it.

............................
DIY DETAILS: 
Wood Paneling = Undercoat: Resene Smooth Surface Sealer; Top Coat x 2 = Resene "Quarter Thorndon Cream"
Unpaneled Walls = Resene "Nebula" (with mould preventer for wet areas added in.)
Round Rope Mirror = $25 from Bed, Bath and Beyond

Other DIY Adventures:

• The Kitchen-Dining DIY Makeover
• Bedroom DIY: A Room to Grow With
• Bedroom Swapsies for a Whole new House
• My DIY Adventures Page

May the 4th be with You (a last minute Star Wars Theme Dinner)

You know what yesterday* was, right? International Star Wars Day. "May the Fourth be with you" and all that. It's an actual thing, didn't you know?

[* TODAY if you're in the northern Hemisphere]

We have a bit of a Star Wars mad population, along with screeds of Jedi regalia and leftover party bits. It's been AGES since we've done a theme dinner, so I impulsively announced at breakfast that we'd be having a Star Wars theme dinner tonight in honour of May the Fourth. Woop. Excitement all round.

Of course, I forgot all about it and did nothing towards it as the day rolled on - and then the kids came home and the little guy was all, "Yay it's our Star Wars dinner tonight!" and I went, "oh bugger".

So I did what every last-minute-Larry does who has promised her kids something and doesn't want to be the party pooper: I fell back on the quick and easy options.

I dug out the light saber napkin rings I stashed last year from our Star Wars Party Just Because; I spread the table with a navy blue sheet and put Mr G's vintage Star Wars pillowcase in the middle. I dug out some gold paper plates left over from some other party. I whipped up a jug of cheats Yoda Soda (apple juice with soda water and a few drops of green food colouring) and announced that Han Burgers were on the menu.

Then I remembered that we had a tube of $2 shop glow sticks lying unused in one of my party supplies boxes... so I made these little beauties in two minutes flat:

Easy peasy! Glow sticks with a strip of silver sticky tape wrapped around one end to form a handle.
Perfect for miniature light saber battles at the dinner table...

Ah yes, there's nothing like a bit of last minute theme dinner fun (and on a school night too).

I think I started working on this at around 5 o'clock. Laid the table, made the burger patties, mixed the drink, turned glow sticks into light sabers. Then told everyone to quickly find a costume and get up to the table at around 6pm. That's all the time it took to pull this off.

(We couldn't find Darth Vader's helmet, so he looks a little weird, but oh well)

It was a bit of impromptu easy dinner fun, just because I felt like we needed something to give us a boost. Any excuse, right? It's been too long.

[Cookies 'n' cream icecream with squirty cream was the best I could come up with for dessert at short notice. Planet Hoth Sundaes? Haha]

So for all my Northern Hemisphere readers who are still in the middle of May the Fourth - why not take a leaf from our book and StarWars-ify tonight's dinner? It's super easy. And lots of fun.

P.S. My (proper) Yoda Soda recipe was featured today on a Canadian website called The Loop who have done a roundup of Star Wars themed food. Check out all the edible Star Wars coolness here.

OTHER STAR WARS FUN POSTS

• Star Wars Party
• Star Wars Party: Darth Vader Pinata
• Star Wars Party: Wookie Cookies & Lightsabers
• Star Wars Party *Just Because*

Three Kids, Three Codes (makes for a busy day)

Three kids, three codes. I thought that was a snappy title for the craziness that is Saturday Winter Sport.
There are three kids playing three sports, all on the same morning. And two parents.
We didn't plan ahead, obviously.
How can you be in three places at once, watching three gripping sports fixtures in one morning when there's only two of you?
Very carefully, that's how.

With lots of overlapping, and driving and txting.
You leave home at 8.45am and you stagger in the door and zip off your (totally inappropriate) boots at 3.30pm.
You go through half a tank of gas. You cheer yourself hoarse.
And you enjoy every minute of it.

Welcome to Saturdays, with three sport-mad kids, playing three codes.

Scrag Plays Rugby
This is Scrag's first year giving rugby a go. It's the "rippa" version (non-tackle), and it's all about speed. Oh my goodness but I enjoyed watching this! Our tall lad is such a natural. the other parents on the sideline couldn't believe Scrag had never played before.
"Yep," I confirmed, "This is is first ever game..."
He scored three tries and came away with the Man of the Match award.
A mum from the opposing team said, "You might be mum to a future All Black!" (Haha - every Kiwi parent's dream?) We have been a soccer family since forever, so this is our first time being a rugby family. And we love it. Scrag loves it. And he's taken to it like a duck to water.

MATCH STATS: Scrag is playing for Eden Rugby Gold in the Under-7s Rippa grade, They played against another team from the same club so had to turn their shirts inside out to avoid confusion. The score was 8-7 to the other team, but a hard-fought match with three tries by Scrag. Woop!

LOGISTICS:  At 8.45am I take Scrag to his game, which kicks off at 9.15am. Mr G meets us there with Dash. He watches the first half then takes Dash to his training across town for 10am. When Scrag's game is over we get smoothies and head to Seddon Fields to watch the next match: Dash playing soccer. (Miss fab tags along with me; her game is not til later).

Dash Plays Soccer
Er, or should I say FOOTBALL? (the proper name for soccer).
Dash has played football since he was four years old, and he has always been a stand-out. This year circumstances forced us to try out for a new club, so  with a new team, a new coach and now playing on a full sized pitch, things are pretty exciting on the football front too.
Dash has always dreamed of being a professional footballer. He's pretty gosh darned good too, so you never know....

MATCH STATS: Dash plays 13th grade football for Western Springs Vespers (the club's second team). First game of the season, they played against a team from Manurewa, the score was 8-0 to us, including a great goal by Dash. Dash plays mostly in the midfield.

LOGISTICS: The game kicked off at 11am and I really should have planned ahead and got a ride for Miss fab to her pre-game training so I could watch all of Dash's game, but no. Instead I got to see the first half, then scurried off to brave the madness of Lincoln Rd traffic to get Miss Fab to her training on time. We were fifteen minutes late and it took me 25 minutes to find a carpark...

Miss Fab Plays Netball
Last year we had to give Netball a miss because the match day was Wednesday which clashed with Miss Fab's true passion, Cheerleading. This year my friend Justine took it upon herself to start a team playing in the Saturday league, so our two cheerleading girls could play netball as well. Justine is THE BEST coach ever. Gosh but she pulls awesomeness out of the girls in her team! The best kind of coach - encouraging, tough, firm and passionate about the game. We are super lucky to have her, and Miss Fab is loving being able to play netball again.

MATCH STATS: Our new team is called the Boston Bolts (and we have snazzy new uniforms and personalised hoodies sourced by the amazing Justine). Our first grading game happened to be against THE top team from THE top league, who won the whole thing in the highest grade last year, apparently. They were tough. But we took the game to them and made them work for their win. the score was 19-10 to them, which doesn't reflect how awesomely our girls played. Super proud netball mums all round.

LOGISTICS: After dropping Miss fab off at her training 15 minutes late at the madness that is (Ti Pai Netball courts) I drove around for 25 minutes before I found a carpark. The game started at 12.45 and we were done by 2pm, but decided to go shopping for winter clothes afterwards(what was I thinking?). So yeah.

At 3.30pm I limped in the front door, dropped the shopping bags on the floor and unzipped my boots. Six hours of standing and walking in wedge boots = not a great move. Next time I'll know better.
Cos next Saturday we'll do it all again (and we can't wait).


P.S. This post is for you Grandma, Aunty Irene, Uncle Allan, Nan and Grandad.