I love food. I admit it.
Food is my friend.
What's not to love? There's icecream, my favourite. Chocolate is pretty good. And who can resist a well-cooked steak? I was once known as the Roast Potato Kid. And how irresistible are french fries, crispy and hot, dipped into tomato sauce, or aoli? And Scones with jam and Cream???? Irresistible!
Food is great for celebrating. What's a party without good food?
Food is great for special occasions. A good restaurant, a bottle of wine, a lovely man... nothing better.
Food is there when you're bored, tired, done in. A bowl of icecream while watching TV at the end of the day? Great company. It doesn't talk or make demands.
Food can be quick 'n' easy. Toasted Cheese Sandwiches. Toast with jam. Drive thru everything.
No need to forgo food when in a rush. Food is easy like that.
So yeah, I have no complaints about food.
Or I didn't.
Until food started hanging around on my hips. Building up on my tum and rounding out my thighs just a little too much. It's like now that I've turned forty food thinks it can just linger here forever.
Used to be I could just cut out sugar in tea, or cookies and the extra kilos would scram in a week or two. But not now. Looks like that icecream thinks it's here to stay.
Food on my hips is making me uncomfortable in the heat. Food calls to me at night, "Hey! I'm over heeeeere!"
Food is becoming annoying.
It has stopped being my friend.
When I put food in my mouth I feel... guilty.
"A moment on the lips... a lifetime on the hips."
Who knew that could be so darn true?
No good spending my life obsessing about calories, fat content and carbs. Yawn.
And yet. I can't let things carry on as they are.
Me, heavy as a heifer. Uncomfortable in my own skin. Feeling like a less-than person as I walk through the mall and see the skinny-clothes, beyond my reach. See the skinny-beans eating without regret.
So, what to do? What to do?
Then along comes the Daniel Fast. A detox diet/fast half the people I know are doing for a month.
Did I consider it? No. Way too hard for a carb-ophile icereamaholic like me.
Then the hubby said, I want to give it a go.
And I thought, hey I know how to make a mean roast vege salad.
And I cooked some for tea and ate just veges. And liked it.
Maybe I could try this...? I thought.
But the next morning, mayhem.
Headache. First day of school. Craziness.
I need a cup of tea!!! my soul screamed at me.
As I stood shaking at the kitchen sink, I felt a whisper.
Go on. Have a cup of tea. And some toast with jam. It's OK. This isn't meant to be legalistic thing. It's about the heart.
Calm and gratitude descended on me. I had my cuppa and toast and we made it to school.
Later as I chopped veges for a vegan ratatouille, another whisper.
This can be about changing your relationship to food.
Wow. That's profound. Food can be my friend. But better food. Healthier food.
And I can take back control. I can be in charge.
I can say no to that bowl of icecream.
If I can eat veges and fruit for ten days or three weeks... I can drive past the drive thru.
I can resist the whole block of Whittakers Roast Almond chocolate.
So it's not official.
But as I sit here drinking my vanilla redbush tea with soy milk (and kinda liking it) I think I just might be on the verge of a healthier me ... and a brand new relationship with my friend, food.